Grammar Blog: Week 11: Fun with Puns.


Thank you for the great pun visual, English 8. Milkshakes are good for everyone unless they’re not (they are). There’s also a pretty good pun generator here.

So we had a pun assignment before this pun assignment.

(On another silly side note: Are you really hitting me for typing in “pun” Grammarly?)

My pun was accessible to my friends who were already fans (fanatics, not the cool you down fans).Far Cry fans would have interpreted the denotation before the connotative meaning, or at least, would have been the most likely. Otherwise, it is not an obvious pun unless it’s read with an explanation. It was fun to write and break down its elements, but I can see why it is not super accessible to anyone who hasn’t heard of the Far Cry series or the Ubisoft company.

So let me start off with a series of horrible puns based around a theme. It should be easy to see, we’ll proceed accordionly.

Now, not to harp on this theme over and over again, but I treble with anticipation every time I can utilize them. There is absolutely no reason to just fiddle around.

Did you catch them?

Music instruments and related terms!

Let’s see:

Accordion was horrible transfigured to combine with accordingly. Harp fit well into the context of the sentence and works as a pun too. Treble was a stretch as it wasn’t necessarily a strict musical term and it barely matches tremble. “Fiddle around” sounds like something that could be a common phrase.

Personally, I think the best puns have homophones, and words that don’t have to be horribly stretched to match the pun. The harp mention was the best example because it was already a well-known phrase and it fit the pun theme. For me, the pun that takes a second to get is most satisfying to create.

So have pun with that!


Grammar Blog: Week 9: You?


I’ve never considered the usage of you. Not you specifically, but the word “you.” I’ll be honest, I’ve considered Yu Darvish more than I’ve actually considered the word usage of “you.”

When I do think of “you,” I realize I’m thinking of myself. When I think to myself about myself, I say and think “you.” “You” doesn’t refer to a separate entity all the time. “I” has its substantial use within my inner thoughts as well, but I still use “you” to refer to myself at times. It’s usually in some particularly admonishing way, like “You can do better,” or if I want to encourage myself, I’d say “You fucking rock!”

I’ve also noticed “you” being used often in interviews. Sports interviews in particular.

Stanton, the interviewee, says “You’ve always got to be ready” at around 1:05. He’s obviously not telling the interviewer he has to be ready to hit a fastball, but Stanton himself has to be ready.

I couldn’t find much writing on the matter other than my own observations, so take my word for it, and the word of the Marlins’ Giancarlo Stanton, that you always have to prepare for a fastball.

But you or I cannot prepare to hit a fastball at all times, so I just opened up my bookmarks, and went straight for the wiki.

I can’t say it actually means anything really, but it’s just a usage of “you” I’ve always noticed. It mostly seems to happen in impromptu on-field interviews. It’s just something you have to prepare for, you know?

Wait, there’s more?

There’s more.

Before this class, I’m fairly certain I had never heard “yunz.” “Y’all” fo’ sho, but never “yunz.” “Yous” is something I’ve always considered to be a type of east coast slang based solely on a Kevin Smith video I saw.

So of course, I can’t find it anywhere. I guess DeNiro will have to step in.

I’ve just thought of both as weird variations of “you” that I would never use.

My god, Grammarly is screaming at me for even typing in “yunz.”

Maybe English don’t make sense.

Grammar Blog: Week 6: – or -?


Guys, I had no idea morse code was a part of modern Grammar. It’s the only place where I found all of the – (Not T’s, but – and – obviously). It seems just a little anachronistic to use this form of communication when we have other forms of communication. I can’t even recall the last time I thought about using my phone to transmit an SOS in morse code. Am I also expected to have



It’s a little much to expect me to use a form of communication that went out of favor in 1999.

Wait… (S)



Oh, this isn’t suddenly a morse code Grammar class.

Well someone should have told me we were talking about – and -, not – and -. Reading context on the Internet is once again proven to be really difficult.

So let’s talk about and leave on the side for now.

Does anyone really think about their hyphen use? Do you keep up-to-date? Once you’ve taken a look at it, it doesn’t seem too difficult. You might have spent one-third of a minute in a trance-like state considering what a hyphen does, but you’ve figured it out by now.

hyphens are used to join two words or parts of words together while avoiding confusion or ambiguity.

Although like most thing in English,

Consult your dictionary if you are not sure if a hyphen is required in a compound word, but remember that current usage may have shifted since your dictionary was published.

Of course.

Dashes seem even more ambiguous in their use. This may not be true in practice for most people, but for one such as I, it can be confusing. I’ve never really dug the use of dashes. I wouldn’t say I avoided them, but I don’t usually think of a situation where I should use one.

You may not think it could be confusing – it is.

This may or may not be an example – you never know.

You may have been the wind beneath my wings – maybe.

If my glowing not-so-obvious examples were not enough then let definitions enlighten your dashing mind.

Dashes can be used to add parenthetical statements or comments in much the same way as you would use brackets.

Alright, that doesn’t seem so bad, I bet you could use this in any situ-

In formal writing, you should use the bracket rather than the dash as a dash is considered less formal.


But most important of all, when I think of dashes, this comes to mind:

Dashes can be used to create emphasis in a sentence.

In the approximately ninety-one-billion-years I’ve spent thinking about hyphens and dashes, I hope my research helped in some small way – you never know.





GRAMMAR BLOG: WEEK 3. Correctness is in the Eye of the Beholder.


Full disclosure: I never played the game listed above. I just thought it was a cool title. Super Nintendo covers had a certain charm to them which isn’t really replicated anymore. That’s my subjective opinion that’s mainly based on five-year-old me’s perception of things and I’m sticking with it, because if there’s ever an answer for artistic subjectivity, it lies in the mind of five-year-old me.

I have no idea if I know what I’m talking about. So in a sense, grammar and artistic critique are very much the same for me. I just know it feels right when I see it.

But of course, correctness is varied in different contexts.

Let’s take a look at one.


Like I need to talk about more video games.

Formal: Overwatch is the greatest game Blizzard has released in the past five years.

Informal: Guys, Overwatch is the best thing Blizz has come out with, in like, a decade.

Slang (probably used in game): gud one blizz.

The formal one is the most accurate in its description because it leaves very little to open interpretation.

The informal one has information and has pauses in conversation that one is likely to hear. It also has an approximation of certain information, but it is not certain.

The slang sentence is one a player is likely to read in-game from another player quickly typing on a keyboard. It uses three words as opposed to the formal sentence that used thirteen.

Each sentence is correct in their own respective context, so when I mean “Correctness is in the Eye of the Beholder,” I mean “Correctness is applicable in varying circumstances and is up to the collective whole to decide the proper usage… in the Eye of the Beholder.”

But really guys, play more video games, it can’t hurt.

Feeling in the Gut


Subliminal desire
Fantastical feel
What have I that a Crier
Would say I deal?
10 9 8- Too late- It’s already gone.

Out the Window
Your query is unrecognized,
But your blood pulses.
You’re not quite mechanized,
Though that will be Chultz’s
To know today.

It’s like going around in circles.